#he is so fucking stupid that it's actually sad

[munsonsmixtapes]

I'm Still Your Boy

Ex=boyfriend!Eddie x fem!reader

After your boyfriend cheats on you at your birthday party, your ex Eddie reminds you that he'll always be your shoulder to cry on.

cw: hurt/comfort, mention of cheating

You don’t know what you did to deserve this. Maybe it’s because of something you did in a past life. Some sort of karma, perhaps? Whatever the reason, you don’t think you actually deserve to be cheated on by your boyfriend. Your boyfriend who told you that he wanted to save himself for you and you alone, which seemed to be a fucking lie just to get in your pants considering you caught him with the very girl he told you not to worry about. 

They were fucking and to make it even more sad, they were fucking in your bed at your birthday party. Well, wasn’t that just the cherry on top of the shit sundae? And they were so caught up in each other that they didn’t even hear you slam the door. 

Before anyone could see you cry, you hurry to the bathroom, thankful that you’re upstairs and that no one else was around. What’s supposed to be a fun celebration has turned into something you’ll remember forever for all the wrong reasons. 

As soon as you’re alone, you sit on the toilet and begin to cry. Maybe you feel a bit pathetic but you can’t help it. Sure, it’s not like you actually loved the man, but it still hurts like hell. Especially when Josh told you time and time again that Chelsea would never be a problem. 

And now you find yourself wondering how long they’ve been doing it behind your back. And why you feel so hurt. It’s not like you even liked him that much. And now this is the excuse to break up with him that you’ve been looking for. 

You’re full on sobbing now and it’s not like you’re surprised, you were expecting it to happen with the way they’re always looking at each other, but you’d think your boyfriend would at least have some decency to not cheat on you at your birthday party. But apparently that was too much to ask. 

You grab some toilet paper from the roll next to you and blow your nose, absolutely positive that you look terrible with mascara tears streaming down your cheeks, but you can’t get yourself to look. That would just make you feel even worse. You spent hours on your makeup and now you let some stupid boy ruin it in a matter of minutes. 

Eddie doesn’t even know what he’s doing at this party. He wants to be here, but he’s not even sure why he was invited. The two of you broke up years ago and even though it was mutual and there was no bad blood, you just drifted apart. 

He feels so weird being here in this house. There are so many memories that the two of you have created here, a time capsule of your relationship. He wants to be there to celebrate you, but being there with all of the little moments the two of you shared throughout your relationship is far too painful to relive. He misses you so much more than he’d ever care to admit. 

He wants to be your friend again, but seeing the way your new boyfriend was glaring daggers at him when everyone was singing “Happy Birthday”, he’s not so sure that’s a good idea. He’s only known he guy a couple of hours and he’s already convinced with a few drinks in his system, he’d knock him the fuck out. 

His name is Josh for starters. Fucking Josh. That should be a red flag on its own. He also somehow got you the wrong cake which was clearly mostly for him since he seemed so excited about it. That seemed to be a common theme considering the same went for your gift. He got you a video game for a system that you don’t even have and it was the second one in a series. 

And Eddie swore he wasn’t going to leave the party alive when you opened your gift from him. It was a special edition of your favorite book as a child and if looks could have killed, he would have been dead. You seemed so grateful for the gift, even going as far as hugging Eddie, nothing but happy tears pricking your eyes. 

He didn’t realize just how much he missed holding you until you were in his arms again. You just fit so perfectly. Before he could reminisce too much, you pulled away, moving back to sit in Josh’s lap, but he was nowhere to be found. 

Out of all of your friends who were there, Eddie seemed to be the only one who could tell just how little fun you were having. How was it that you seemed to be invisible at your own birthday party? Why was he the only one who seemed to care? The two of you weren’t even friends anymore. Maybe after tonight, that’ll change.He really wants to reconnect. Maybe he can invite you out for coffee and the two of you can catch up. 

It’s almost midnight. Most of the guests have already left or they’re so drunk that they’ve passed out on the various pieces of furniture around the first level of the house. You’ve disappeared and that’s all Eddie cares about. He wants to find you so he can say goodnight and get the fuck out of there before he does something he’ll regret. 

He heads up the stairs on the hunt for you, but he realizes that he needs to go to the bathroom first. He knows he should anyway before he hits the road. He sees the bathroom door is cracked and heads for it, opening it expecting to see it empty, but he finds you sitting on the toilet sobbing your eyes out. 

“Eddie, hey,” you grin at him, trying your best to look normal even though your eyes are red and your cheeks are tear stained. 

“Hey.” He waves awkwardly in a way that you’ve always found so adorable. “Sorry, I didn't know anyone was in here. I’ll give you some privacy. He turns to leave, but you grab hold of his wrist before he can get too far. 

“Will you stay with me?” You ask with a sniff. He would stay with you even if you weren’t crying, but he especially will because you are. 

He shuts the door all the way then sits on his knees in front of you, forcing himself to look at you even though seeing you cry always broke his heart. He doesn’t know why you’re crying but he has a guess. He doesn’t ask even though he really wants to. He wants to wait for you to speak, not wanting to pry, but just keep you company as you go through a hard time. 

He takes the toilet paper from you and wipes away your tears, gently dabbing to preserve what little makeup is left. He knows how important that kind of thing is to you. Well, he’s actually not so sure you feel that way still. He forgets that he doesn’t actually know you anymore. 

“I look terrible, don’t I?” You look up at him, lips trembling and he really doesn't think he can take seeing you cry anymore. It’ll just make his heart break even more than it already has.

“You look beautiful as always.” It’s his go-to response but it always worked like a charm. He wonders if his flirting still has the same effect on you. He used to love seeing the way you’d get all giggly when he would compliment you. 

“But you have to say that, you’re my-” you cut yourself off, remember that Eddie isn’t your boyfriend anymore. Your boyfriend is the reason why you’re crying. “Sorry, habit.” 

“Don’t apologize,” he shakes his head. “You do look beautiful, though. That dress is great, but I wouldn’t expect anything less. You always did have good style, y/n.” 

“Is this all just your clever way of getting into my pants?” The words are dripping with venom and Eddie wonders what he said that made everything shift. He was just paying a compliment, nothing more, nothing less. 

His eyes widen and he stammers, trying his best to save himself quickly as he’s drowning fast. Your eyes widen as well so clearly you’re just as surprised by your sudden outburst. You have no idea where it came from especially since Eddie has never been that kind of guy and he especially wouldn’t be now knowing that you have a boyfriend.

“No,” he finally says as he’s able to find the words. “I was just paying you a compliment and you know that.” 

“I-I’m sorry.” You’re shaking your head, hating how you’ve spoken to him, accusing him  of something that he clearly wasn’t even doing. “I just caught Josh cheating on me and I guess I’m taking it out on you.” 

“He what?” Oh now he’s livid. He’s got to kiss this guy’s ass now that he finally has an excuse. 

“It’s my fault,” you shake your head again. “I wasn’t giving him enough attention-” your words are cut off by Eddie taking your face in his hands, staring you down. 

“It’s not your fault. Stop making excuses for him y/n. That guy is a fucking loser and he doesn’t deserve you. He deserves to end up broke and alone.” You know he’s right but just want to pass the blame onto yourself because then there would actually be a reason for Josh’s cheating other than the fact that he just doesn’t seem to care about you. 

“You always know what to say, don’t you?” He does in your eyes. ever since the two of you started hanging out, he had a knack for telling you exactly what you needed to hear even if it was a little too blunt for your liking. You appreciated that he never failed to tell you the truth no matter how much it may have hurt.

“I try.” It seems like all of your feelings for each other that have been bottled up are pouring out, now almost palpable because of how strong they are.

“I miss you.” 

“I miss you too,” Eddie replies, moving his thumbs back and forth across your cheeks just like he used to do. “I’ll be kicking myself for letting you slip through my fingers for the rest of my life.”

“What if we gave it another try? The friendship part?” Your face lights up at his suggestion and you decide that this is the best birthday present you’ve ever received. 

“I’d really like that. Hey, I think Benny’s is still open. Do you want to get something to eat?” 

“I’d love nothing more.” Eddie helps you up from the toilet and leads you out the front door where you head to his van to head to the diner. 

The two of you find yourselves in your favorite booth, eating and laughing like no time has passed. You stay there into the early morning as the sun comes up, finishing off your meal with a milkshake that the two of you share for old time’s sake and right then and there, Eddie realizes that he’s still is very much your boy, still wrapped around your goddamn finger just the way he likes and there’s no other place he’d rather be.

[4chensungs]

don’t kiss and tell

brothers best friend!jisung x fem. reader

after the incident of your brother finding out you hooked up with one of his friends, you promised to yourself to never look out for him anymore. but who says he’ll give up on you that easily?

wc. 2.8k

warnings. smut (mdni), jisung is down bad, body worship like crazy in here, tit sucking, fingering, ass slapping, unprotected sex

part 1 for context here <3

IT HAS BEEN one whole month since you last talked to jisung. one month since you saw him probably for the last time in a hot minute.

the last few weeks have been extremely unusual; you keep questioning yourself how was he doing, if he's even ever going to appear at your house again to hang out with you brother, like he always did. he's probably not.

and fuck jaemin, fuck him for screwing your bond with him. it's useless, pure jealousy and he's so stupid!, stupid for being this mad with one if his best friends of years, simply because he thinks you're still a child.

on the other hand, jisung is being not so subtle in the way he still wants you. he keeps liking the pics you post on your instagram stories, sometimes even replying to them. and it's the sad fact you're not giving him a single reply.

his mind wanders to the thought of you being already completely over him, wanting to distance yourself fully right now, thanks to your brother.

but your heart knows that's not what you want, and it keeps giving you a warning that the next time that you see him, these feelings will come back stronger than ever.

you miss him. so bad, thinking about him makes you sick.

you're laying in bed, scrolling quietly through your phone when the damn notification appears. why does he keep trying? you sigh out loud.

the__and.y liked your stories.

you ran your hands through your hair, turning off your phone to stare at the ceiling to collect your breath. you can't, your brother is still furious with both of you.

jisung ♡: why do u keep ignoring me in every existing social media

is he really going to do this? at this late at night?

jisung ♡: i miss you

you kept reading his messages and not replying. you didn't contact him for a month.

maybe, just maybe, things may have gotten lighter with jaemin. perhaps he's not really remembering this whole thing, yeah?

you: i'm sorry jisung

you: idk if this is right i really don't know

you: im confused

you turn off your phone again while waiting for his reply. let's give it a try.

jisung ♡: why wouldn't it be right

jisung ♡: jaemin can't control your life, you can do whatever you want

hm.

you: i felt bad that day and he's still so mad with you

you: idc if he's mad with me, he's my brother at the end of the day

you: i worry about you and how hes fucked up your friendship

jisung ♡: baby you know what's fucked up

jisung ♡: you trying to convince yourself that you don't want this because of him

jisung ♡: say to my face that you don't want it

you want this so fucking bad. to be in his arms again, and the thrill of being with him behind closed doors. god, that's all you want in every way.

you: ji

you: i want to see you

jisung ♡: that's right

jisung ♡: i've waited for this princess

jisung ♡: waited so long

you: i need you

you: i don't care anymore

you really don't give a fuck - your brother can hold his protectiveness instinct for himself, he actually can. you can't control what your heart aims for.

and it screams for park jisung.

"you can't ignore him forever, you know that?"

"who says I'm ignoring him? I texted him yesterday saying he should come this weekend." jaemin huffed, acting oblivious to the fact that the only reason why he invited jisung over was because of the boys' annual end of year party.

chenle deadpans at him with his stare, letting out a chuckle, "if you didn't invite him I would've done it myself." he paused, turning his head to look at the man, "that would be bullshit."

bullshit. jaemin swore he almost threw chenle out of the car in the harshest way possible - clicking his tongue in pure annoyance, "yeah, it was just fine when he fucked my sister behind my back."

"i'm pretty sure they did not fuck."

if you didn't then why were you both half naked. in his car. at your backyard?

"i'm telling you, I saw it. she was literally on top of him and she was fucking moaning his name, chenle. that's fucking wrong." your brother spat while still not looking at his friend - eyes focused on the road.

chenle keeps going, "cut this off, jaem. you can't see her as a baby anymore. let her live."

jisung is indeed coming to your house again - sooner than you thought. but it did take some days for you to find out, tho. you brother wasn't the one who told you.

in the same day, the last messages jisung sent you before you went to sleep.

jisung ♡: dress up prettily for me tomorrow

jisung ♡: will you?

you: what??

you: you're coming???

jisung ♡: jaemin told me to go and yeah i didn't expect it as well

jisung ♡: dreaming of you again

jisung ♡: kissing your sweet lips holding you so close to me

jisung ♡: it'll be all mine princess

you: go to sleep ji

you: silly

jisung ♡: i'll show you what's silly tomorrow

—

the sound of the boys laughing and loud pitching talking in the living room did quite mess with your head, anticipating the moment when he comes. it's crazy how you got so dolled up for him only, he's the reason why you're even going out of your room this night.

if it wasn't for jisung, you'd probably just greet the guys and come back to your own quiet place, drowning in your thoughts, alone. just like you always used to do before he appeared in your life.

a knock was heard on your door just right after you finished your makeup. unexpectedly, you meet a very tipsy jaemin.

"what the fuck is this outfit?" he spats, crossing his arms in front of his chest - his body unbalanced. for a split second, you closed your eyes and thanked all the existing Gods under your breath. he's drunk.

you smiled, "felt pretty today. you smell like beer, don't talk to me."

"hey, hey, hey." he grabbed your arm before you could close the door and kick him out, "come say hello to my friends. don't be rude."

you fixed your hair and outfit and went to the living room, being find with chenle, jeno and donghyuck's figures sat around the big table, nestled with all the different kinds of drinks and alcohol.

your breath hitched when jisung was nowhere to be found.

after greeting the guys, you decided to wait in your room - not sure on how, or when will jisung get there and you'll finally get to release all of your wants. show him how much you miss him and vice versa.

not much time had passed before another knock was heard on your door. you were sprawled on bed, dim lighting decorating the ambient.

"come in."

you said that because you thought it was your brother. jisung carefully opened the door, eyes peeking first to check on you.

that scene truly felt like a movie. you slowly got up, a smile starting to pop up in your lips as you walked to him.

your voice trembling, "hi, ji."

you opened the door fully for him to enter your space, he wasted no time to step in and pull you into a hug.

a mess was happening in your head, so ridiculously dizzy from him - the masculine smell of his cologne filling your nostrils, his hands holding your body flush to him while yours gripped his black t shirt, so simple and casual but yet made him look so attractive.

or maybe that’s just because you miss him a lot.

jisung leaned away from your embrace, gently taking your hair out of your face while holding eye contact - hands flew to your hips.

"you look gorgeous. more than ever."

your arms secured their hold around his neck, feeling your cheeks burning red from his words, "just for you." you announced.

he nodded, "all for me."

you both smiled like two idiots in love as he leaned down to kiss you, mouths melting so sweet at first - tongues brushing here and there, hums being heard throughout the kiss, "so pretty in this dress." he mumbles in between.

his back hits the door as he closes it, left hand leaving your hips for a mere second just to lock it.  making absolute sure that no one will be able to interrupt.

jisung grabs a hold of your thighs to help you walk further into your room, so familiar to him.

all the times you've sneaked out, when jisung slept by and left jaemin's room in the middle of the night when he was in a deep sleep. all behind his back with so much carefulness.

when he lays you down he's quick to trail his wet kisses down to your neck, firm hands caressing your whole body, going up and down in motions.

you arch into him, playing with his black hair strands as his face rests on your chest, meanwhile his lips keeps smooching your hot skin.

you sigh in contentment, knees pressing together - trying to give him a sign that you're needy, so painfully needy for him.

"jisung i want- mhhm" your words get cut off by your own whine when his hand grabs the top of your dress to pull it down, hanging it just below your bra.

"don't want to take your dress off.. youre looking too beautiful like this." his deep voice quietly said.

you smile at his sweet comment, holding back all your whines combined with the feeling of his fingers messing with the lace of your white bra, throwing your head back with no shame when he pulls the fabric down to expose your breasts, still not taking it off your body.

"so pretty, princess. i could admire you all day."

cool air is fast to hit but it's soon replaced by jisung's hot mouth, circling your breast with his tongue, hand massaging the other while his mouth does wonders on your soft flesh.

when he reaches for your nipple you whine even louder, his saliva pooling and soaking your whole breast when he sucks it into his warm hot mouth, humming nonstop.

"you're crazy ji-jisung."

"should i stop?" he teases, leaning his mouth away from your nipple and replacing it with his finger, rubbing it.

"no for fucks sake.. but I'm trying so hard to keep quiet." your voice trembled slightly.

jisung looks at you then laughs, “they’re so wasted right now, no one’s conscious in that room, love.”

you pout at him, he softly traces your bottom lip with his thumb before kissing you again, “I promise you, it’s okay. but I need you to tell me it’s okay with you.”

his soft and caring voice did turn you on even more, it shouldn’t, but it made you wetter. eyes holding so much love and appreciation looking at yours - “I want this. I want you, ji.”

jisung smiles one more time, giving you a nod and resumed his work, mumbling a deep “fuck” under his breath when he tested the waters, hand went under your dress to feel your core.

he pulled the ends of your dress up to your stomach, your thighs ridiculously pressed together. you should be ashamed of how wet you were, but you’re not, not even a single bit.

he gives your thighs a caress, “let me spread them, hm?”

your breath hitches when he brings your knees to your chest, spreading you all open and full for him. jisung mentally coos at the scene in front of him.

just like your bra, white lace panties with a wet dark patch decorated in the middle, like a gift for him. it drove him crazy.

“did you miss me that much, princess?” you can only moan as response when he touches the wet patch with his finger before pulling the lace to the side, holding it in place with one finger, while his middle finger travels up and down your cunt.

wet, so fucking wet, “fuck. love, i might cum just by looking at this.” he cursed and cursed again, eyes wide open and looking straight at your puffy displayed cunt, so wet just for him. he knew that and so did you.

“oh fuck baby i can’t-“ jisung’s fingers spread you open to admire you better - in love, genuinely in love with how your pretty pussy shines for him, glistening and begging to suck him in.

he leans down fast enough to give your clit a quick kiss, “can’t stop thinking about how beautiful she is.” still caressing your core.

you moan his name desperately at his nasty but sweet comment, tons of whines and “jisung” ‘s leaving your mouth.

“ji please. want your fingers.” you manage to say.

“of course, gotta prep my beautiful girl.” he smiles, an expert finger circling your clit before diving down into your entrance. covered with slick, your cunt invites him just as soon.

experienced fingers pumping in and out continuously, you whine with your eyes closed at the sound of wetness.

jisung’s in complete awe, stoping his staring at your hole to kiss your face, first at the corner of your mouth, then at your lips, shutting your whines off.

“you’re perfect.” he leans away to say.

nothing’s more perfect in this world than the sensation of his long and thick fingers inside you, scissoring you and reaching the deepest and most sensitive spots ever. you’ll say that to him later.

you try to smile but you soon harshly bite your lip when he curled his two fingers inside, you yelped, “jisung! oh my god-“

he kisses you again, and again, until he’s satisfied and thinks you’re ready to take him. jisung’s fingers leave you empty, and you let out a cry - his eyes make their way to between your legs to see how you’re pulsating.

“never seen my princess this wet..” deep cocky voice says.

you reach out to take off your dress, “i’ve missed you.”

when your dress was discarded to the floor, he was quick to unbutton his jeans as they went to the same destination of your clothes.

you could see his erection through his boxers, and as much as you want to such him off right now, you’re needing him inside. now.

your panties were about to be discarded before jisung grabbed your hand and shook his head, “want them on, baby. s’ pretty. keep the bra too.”

knowing how he likes it with you, you turned around and pinned your front to the bed, arching your back and your ass in the air.

“fuck, just like that.” he pumps his cock at first, cooing you while you wait for him.

jisung’s hands flew to your back to arch it even more, then to hold your hips. he rubs the head of his dick on your entrance, how your pussy almost sucks him in just from the rubbing.

when he enters you, you let out a little too loud moan. hands clutching the sheets and tears filling your eyes.

he’s completely focused on how you keep clenching around him - the amusing view of your cunt sucking him all the way in, then out again.

your hips were pressed to his shaft, feeling him so fucking deep into your womb.

jisung coos again, “you don’t know how I’ve been dying for this.” he slaps your ass.

“jisung! jisung fuck, jisung.” you whine like a baby, lost in the pleasure. ass stinging from his big hand slap and cunt begging to be filled until you get sore.

“my love.” another slap, “fucking made just for me.”

his cock is so big and it leaves you like a babbling mess, so big that it almost hurts from how good it is, hits you in all places.

you both were getting closer, his thrusts started to get sloppier and messier, slower as he pulled away to release at your back.

your own release dripped down your pussy and thighs, while his hot cum painted your back down to your ass cheeks. what a scene.

“want them all to see this mess.. jaemin needs to see how you’re good to me.“ he admires the sight of your cunt clenching and unclenching around absolutely nothing but the air, “can’t believe you’re mine and no one can ever change that.”

you tiredly laid back on your back again, trying to fix your hair. jisung’s sweaty body joined you after tossing the dirty sheets aside, he breathes heavy, but still with that cute smile on his lips.

“do you think they heard something?.” you look up at him, voice low.

jisung thinks for a second, furrowing his brows, “i honestly don’t think so, baby. but you need to change these sheets..”

“of course i will, ji.” you laughed fondly. there’s still some questions hanging in the air, with what face will he come back to the boys?

“and if they ask you where were you this whole time and what were you doing…?”

“then i’ll just say that i was fucking the prettiest girl in the family and i don’t regret it.”

—

© 4chensungs

[temiizpalace]

★┊"THANK YOU FOR PLAYING WITH ME.”

SUMMARY: you lose the marbles game, lookig at jamil one final time.

CHARACTERS: jamil viper

GENRE: angst, squid game au

WARNINGS: mentions of death, gunshots and cursing. spoilers for squid game season 1. please read at own risk.

NOTES: my friends wanted to watch squid game together and there is material to work with. please enjoy, this idea was fun, despite not being much. (readers player number was selected randomly).

reader is g/n

★˙∘

you watched as your marble rolls across the field, only falling slightly behind jamil’s. staring at the small ball, you smiled to yourself, turning to jamil who couldn’t bear to look at you.

his head was turned, looking toward the wall. he should’ve known. of course they’d pit allies against each other, making them turn against one another all for the sake of cash, it was inevitable, you could see it from miles away.

..and yet, he still fell for the stupid trap. he clenched his fist, cursing himself. why.. why did he feel so strongly? strongly for someone he had met recently? it’s dumb, idiotic, and foolish.

so why?

“jamil.” you call out, making him flinch. failing to respond, you call out once more. “jamil,” you smile, putting the bag of marbles in his hand. “you win, you’re one game closer to traveling the world!” hearing your voice, there was a certain contempt within it, like you’re satisfied with the outcome.

that tone infuriated him, causing him to grit his teeth. “you..” he mutters, turning abruptly and grabbing your collar. jamil nearly slams you against the wall, eyes holding a certain look of pure fury. “..you tried to lose?” as he raised his voice you flinched, not expecting the outburst.

“you’re fucking serious?! you’re just giving up?!” he shouts, scowling and shaking you back and forth. you hadn’t expected such a reaction from someone as calm and composed as jamil, so seeing him like this was certainly a shock.

during every game, he had kept a straight face. you admired him for this, keeping so collected and straight faced, even in the face of death. yet, here he was.

he shoves the marbles back into your hand, glaring at you with a hardened expression. “..throw it again.” he demands, his hands shaky. you stare at the bag in your hands, void of any look of sadness. “i lost.” you shrug, holding the bag loosely in your hands. “i said throw it again.” he hissed, his grip on your collar tightening.

you chuckle, slipping the marbles into his pockets. “even if i did, id still lose.” he bit his lower lip, trying to bite back his hurl of aggressive pleads. “why..” he grunts, his voice cracking.

“why?” you repeat, moving your hand to hold his. “..you deserve to win. you had ambitions, hopes, dreams, it inspired me.” you state, holding his hand in a tight grip. “i had nothing outside of these games. nothing to win for.”

“don’t say that.. don’t you dare fucking say that,” he quivers, shaking his head. he choked back the tears threatening to spill, shutting his eyes tightly as you pat his back. “..maybe, in another universe, we’ll be able to travel the world together.” you pull him in, feeling his hands move from your collar to wrapping around you.

“we can’t be together in this universe, but perhaps in another, we’ll be able to do so much more.” you eye the guards approaching giving jamil one last squeeze.

they pull him away, his back turned from you. the guards approached you, but before they pulled the trigger, you decide to deliver your final words. “jamil!”

he freezes, as do the guards.

“thank you,” your eyes crinkle, eyes watering as you began.

“thank you, for playing with me.”

taking your final breath, the guards placed the weapon to your head. jamil flinches as he heard the gunshot, wiping his tears as he walked away. he couldn’t turn to face your lifeless body.

ah, he realizes why he liked you so much now.

you were the only person willing to understand him. the only one who saw him, to lookout for him. for once, he actually dreamed. even in these terrible games, you were a beacon of hope he could follow in these dark times.

you taught him how to dream.

PLAYER 298, ELIMINATED.

A/N: guess which death this is based on lol im not coping you are lol (tbh not exactly what i expected but it’s almost 1AM and i am writing this all on memory and caffeine) anyways how do we feel abt the angst fic

date published: 01/11/25

© temiizpalace — do not copy, steal, or put my work into ai. thank you!

[sulfies]

"Its 5 am"

A soft heat landed on Desmond's shoulders, he pulled the corners of the blanket closer.

"I know, I know... I should be asleep" He sighs scooting the chair back and leaning to look at the ceiling. "I will... sooner or later. I just, I really rather it be "later" "

"And I rather not see you like this."

He finally looked at Altaïr with a weak smirk.

"Oh I know just how you like to see me-" "Desmond..."

Desmond sighed. He was tired, exhousted, sad and many more, all of it just wanted to explode out of him but he just didn't know how.

"I..." He mouthed the words he wanted to say. "Just..." Leaning forward he put his head on his hands. "I don't want to... I-"

"You are scared..."

Desmond blinked hard, refusing the tears that wanted to fall.

"Why?"

He sucked in a hard breath. He was not going to cry about a problem of his own making.

"Desmond... Whatever you are scared of will not ha-"

He felt like a child throwing a tantrum. "God, I sound so stupid I know, but what if it does?" He wiped his face and looked back.

"Your body will do it for you if you don't."

A deep breath and he tried to speak more calmly to control the tremble in his voice. "I realize that... but if it gives me 1 more hour here..."

"Here? Alone in your room, miserable? I get why-"

"No you don't get why..."

Desmond turned back to the table, trying to carve a hole in the desk with his gaze alone. "You don't get why, Ezio doesn't get why, Connor doesn't get why! It is, literally, impossible for you guys to get it, okay?"

"At least let us try? But you won't even talk to us about it!" Altaïr was getting frustrated.

"How can I even start? I don't even know where I can begin. I barely even know this shit works myself!"

He just didn't want to blink and for it all to be gone, he did not want to see that grey, soulless place ever again. He hated it back then, he hated it even more now.

"If I sleep I might wake up" He shook his head, what a profound sentence he came up with.

"come again?"

"I-I don't want to lose this... Whatever this is and I don't know if I will! İts a gamble each time I go to sleep"

"Why would you lose us?"

A chuckle slipped past him "Come on Altaïr, why do I even have you guys now? For fucks sake I died! You were born thousands and thousands of years ago and now you are here! Same with the others! Nothing makes sense nothing ever feels real and I am scared it actually is not!" He dug his nails into his palm, he wanted to bang his head against a wall.

"I am so scared, in one second I will be finally happy and breathe, then the next second I will be back in that place. There is nothing there Altaïr, nothing. No sounds, not even your own breathing. At least the last time they gave me an island and... And 16 was there to keep me company but now if I go back I am scared that there will be nothing."

He took a breath, then another since it was getting harder to.

"I fucking died so, so, so many times. As you, As Connor and As Ezio. From age and my own mistakes. Then I died myself and sometimes I wonder if I actually did or if this is a sick joke and I am still in that goddamn machine that is sucking me for all I am worth just to keep me going!" His fist banged on the table, he wanted to wreck something. "Or maybe Juno is playing with me, showing me a piece of heaven before she spits on my corpse"

Two cold hands wrapped around his own, taking his gaze away from the desk he saw Altaïr with his brows in a concerned burrow, which was becoming a common expression he had whenever he was with him. "I will never know Altaïr and it scares me. For all I know you guys could be programs to make me spea-"

"Okay enough" The hands on his squeezed harshly, Altaïr moved his hands to pull Desmond's chair to the side so he could speak eye to eye.

"You cannot talk about my being like I am not here Desmond." He took a breath to collect himself as well "You are right, I might never understand but you don't get to tell me what I am when I am right in front of you, you don't get to tell me I can't try to understand. I feel real to myself and you feel damn real to me" His hand holds Desmond's cheek.

"but if you keep up like this I'm not sure how long you can keep yourself from going insane to the point of no return. You can't live like this." Desmond's lips became a thin line. "I don't want you to live like this, I know me or any of us being here is not normal but nothing ever was. An orb, holding mind-controlling powers and secrets to the time itself is not normal, Ancient beings leaving a message through us to you is not normal. Do you think I, myself don't think this is too good to be real?" His other hand squeezed Desmond's knee, he sighed and continued, at least Desmond was listening for now.

"Nothing ever is normal in the life of an Assassin and if it was I would never have you. So don't take this away from me by deciding that this-" he gestured between them. "Is temporary"

He placed a small kiss on Desmond's salty cheek only to hear a sob spill out of the man. "We are all riddled with the same fear, yours is..." He could not even begin to comprehend from what little Desmond had told them.

He drew him into a hug "I wonder many nights if this is a last dream from the apple for keeping it safe, If it will end one day before I rest forever in my tomb filled with books."

Desmond was crying now, silently as he could but Altaïr could feel the damp patch on his shoulder "And if it is a last thank-you gift I rather spend every grain of that hourglass with you by my side, stop torturing yourself. If it is a limited time we have together, enjoy it with me" A shakey breath and a sob slipped from Desmond as the damp patch grew.

Altaïr held him through the shaking and pain, in a sick way he was happy to at least hold Desmond after so long and have him for just himself for a little while.

He was lucky, unlike Desmond all of them chose death on their own terms and tasted it slowly. Not with a bang and flash of lights but with a much-needed rest, in a slumber.

"Come, Ill kee-"

Oh...

He realized the hug had much more weight to it than before.

With a slight smile, he sighed in relief, Desmond's body made the choice for him it seemed.

"Ill keep guard for you Desmond, alright?"

He smiled softly and brushed the passed-out man's hair. Sometimes he forgot that while Desmond lived decades in their body he only got to see two of his own life.

He dragged Desmond more into himself and lifted him up softly to walk to his room.

If needed to be he would gladly take the burden of being awake forever to put him at ease.

[thepunkmuppet]

approaching The Confession Scene and what the fuck. this is genuinely tragic like I’ve always seen it as a meme, a joke, an iconic moment in fandom history, whatever, I’m a tumblr user, but now that I’m actually here it’s just fucking SAD

season 15 as a whole is NOT bad. it’s really not. but there’s zero destiel. they rarely speak at all unless it’s plot-related, one (1) episode pairs them together, frankly season seven was ten times more focused on their friendship and that’s INSANE because cas is only in like five fucking episodes of that one. they have a mini arc midway through the season which is very gorgeous and well-done, but it then goes absolutely nowhere and nothing at all is done to make it textually romantic.

by which I mean: no episodes have dean or cas reacting personally to sam and eileen’s relationship, or any other romantic relationship they come across. we’re never shown anything even remotely romantic even in an unrequited sense (no post-realisation awkwardness, no lingering shots of cas pining from afar, etc etc). it reads like a normal season of the show, which, yeah, I think those two are pretty fucking gay regardless, but they’re always textually written as a friendship, with no explicit cues to clue the audience in that there are canon romantic feelings. and that doesn’t change here, at all.

so I guess what I’m saying is the confession scene is purely just a moment of fan service. as stunning as the speech itself is, and as well as it fits cas’s character, the writers throughout the season didn’t actually give a fuck to make destiel ROMANTIC even in a one-sided way. film is a language and as much as misha does in his acting, even from castiel’s perspective they’re still framed as a friendship within the show itself RIGHT up until he says the words I love you. they weren’t interested in actually depicting a (even one-sided) queer love story, just wanted to give fans their “okay here it is we did it guys!” moment at the end, so that way they didn’t have to actually show an explicitly romantic gay love story, they could just say some words, kill cas off and boom it’s canon! here you go people we’ve been leading on, mocking and low-key gaslighting for eleven years!

idk man it’s just so disappointing. I knew it was and I know everyone has been talking about it for years now but my GOD it’s so bad 😭 I can’t even tell you how bizzare it is to have seen destiel confession meme on here and in various fandom video essays EVERY DAY FOR FOUR PLUS YEARS and now here I am, watching it go down in real time with full context, having watched over 300 episodes of this show, invested, obsessed, and REALLY FUCKING UPSET AAAAHHH

EDIT: forgot to mention this originally. the actual concept of cas’s moment of perfect happiness killing him, while kind of stolen from buffy, is AMAZING. and the literal perfect opportunity to have a building textual confirmation of his feelings throughout the season, where he realises what that moment will be, and it ends in the tragic confession of his love. like that’s insane that’s perfect. but no it just comes out of nowhere so oh fucking well whatever I guess! they’re canon so we should all be happy! I hate this stupid bumhole show AUGH no one talk to me ever :(

[mageofquandrix]

Ooh, how about 17 for the WIP folder game!

This was a popular one, haha!

Anyway, this is my take on the Rook & Emmrich romance argument. It's one of the very DATV things I wrote, so it's really rough; I actually had to go in and change Lucien's name, because I renamed him halfway through my first playthrough. I'll probably end up scrapping most of what's on the page, but some iteration of the idea will end up in my canon playthrough fic.

As always, first draft, please be kind!

“It breaks my heart to hear you worry like this,” he said softly, giving Emmrich as sad smile as he reached out to place a comforting hand on his arm.

“Darling, I didn’t-” he started with a pained look, and then drew back, out of Lucien’s reach. Lucien frowned, a pang of rejection as his hand fell, and he placed it on his hip instead. “I only wish to be fair to you,” Emmrich continued, his voice firmer, his face set in an unhappy seriousness. It didn’t suit him, and Lucien wanted to reach out and soothe the lines of tension in his jaw, to kiss him, until this bout of terror bled away. But Emmrich had already pulled away once, and Lucien was not interested in trying to force affection on him.

“I know what I’m getting into,” Lucien begun, but he was cut off. Emmrich gave a sardonic huff of a laugh, and a derisive look, eyebrow arched skeptically.

“At your age?”

A spike of irritation suddenly got Lucien’s back up, and he frowned, his arms crossing tight against his chest. It wasn’t as if their age difference didn’t ever affect them; Lucien sometimes frustrated him for his lack of relative maturity, and for his part, Emmrich could be dismissive and patronizing, particularly when he was upset. “Don’t start,” he said, an edge of warning in his tone.

“We must consider this,” Emmrich continued, and Lucien barely managed to bite back that they had considered it, they’d been through this, though clearly not to whatever depth Emmrich felt like it warranted.

“You’re over thinking it, and it’s not the time,” he tried, one last effort to remind his partner of what exactly they were doing tomorrow, that this really wasn’t, for his part, what Lucien wanted to spend the evening doing. Despite himself, though, he could feel his frustrations from all the conversations of the past, the resentment he tried to pack away that Emmrich couldn’t just leave it alone, rising to the surface, despite how he tried to swallow it back.

“One of us needs to consider my mortality!” Emmrich said, his voice raised to practically shouting, his eyes narrowed and angry. Lucien broke.

“Because you’re worried about me?” he said -no, shouted. His voice almost bizarre to him as he heard it in his own ears. He’d never spoken to Emmrich like this before and even as a part of him warned to pull back, his blood pounded in his ears, and he sharply advanced on him, even as Emmrich took a surprised step back.

“Or because you’re insecure about you? Because Emmrich, we’ve been over this, and I don’t know what you want me to say!” He pushed an angry hand through his hair, and he could feel the fire building in his chest. “What do you want me to say? What can I possibly say, that will be good enough for you?”

“Lucien, I-” Emmrich started, but Rook cut him off again, the sound of his voice just making him angry again.

“Do you want me to say, that I’m thrilled at the thought that you’ll die before me? Do you think I haven’t thought of it? You bring it up all the time, and nothing I say is ever good enough?What do you want from me?”

Emmrich scowled, his arms crossed against his chest. “I simply don’t believe it’s fair to you, to-“

“Are you breaking up with me?”

The room was impossibly still; even the fireplace seemed to hush. Lucien regretted saying it, wished he could take it back. He didn’t want to know, but he had to.

Emmrich stared at him, his mouth open in stunned silence.

As the seconds stretched, Lucien’s hands begun to shake. The bracelet, the stupid fucking gift he was still holding, rattled in its box. “Oh fuck. You are.”

[starbrsts]

although she already feels more like herself in his presence than she has in a long time, the feeling of his hand grabbing hers and rubbing ever so gently over her skin is what brings her to life again. it's both a stomach punch and the greatest comfort, and her eyes can't help but glance down at the way they connect together physically, perfect in every single way. a knowing sigh leaves her lips, looking back up to the male that makes her heart thud wildly in her chest. "you always did see through my bullshit, huh?" a soft chuckle escapes her mouth, her attempt to lighten the mood but what they are dealing with is heavy, thick with emotion and she doesn't wanna run from that anymore. "things with him aren't very good." she knows she doesn't have to say it for him to know, and her cheeks burn a soft pink in embarrassment. she's a stronger girl than this, stronger then to settle for mediocrity and she feels beyond silly for entertaining any of grant's antics. if she had to guess though, it was because her heart never belonged to him, it had always belonged to milo.

his next words have her holding onto his hand a little tighter, the petite blonde felt weak in the knees from the rush of absolute relief. "i missed you too." she's quick to tell him in return, eyes full of longing, hoping that she can convey to him now just how much she needs him. daphne feels like he's everywhere she goes, even starting to send stupid texts on lonely nights or when she seems something that reminds her of him - not caring that he won't see it, it still makes her feel closer to him. she's hopeful, but still feels as if she's holding her breath, afraid that he's realized how much better off he is without her. it hits her right here.. maybe now more than ever that it was beyond foolish to ever believe for a moment that she could exist in a world where he wasn't in her life. that she could let him go on without knowing that every feeling he felt for her she had felt right back.

"fuck, milo.. i've missed you so much. every day." her head shakes in disbelief, taking a careful step closer to him now, yearning eyes watching him. "and you have to know that i'm so sorry." she finds the confidence to speak from the heart despite how it aches, because it's what he's always deserved from her. "you want me to be happy? well i'm not without you." a sad smile pulls at her lips, throat catching with emotion. "turns out i'm actually pretty miserable without you."

Her words about Grant felt shallow, a veil over something deeper, and he knew she was barely scratching the surface. It was clear in the way her voice faltered, in the way her eyes couldn’t quite meet his for too long. His jaw clenched, the name Grant alone a bitter taste in his mouth, for it embodied the mediocrity that had claimed her heart. This wasn’t about him. This was about Daphne—his Daphne—who had, with a quiet resignation, settled for far less than the boundless love she deserved. He longed to reach across the chasm of space between them, to pull her close as he once had, but the distance—the distance of time, of pain—made each gesture, each word, feel laden with an unspoken weight. "You don’t have to sell it to me, Daph. You know you can be honest with me" Milo announced, finally giving in and reaching out to grab her hand, his thumb grazing over the ridge of her knuckles in a gentle reassurance. 

He inhaled deeply, almost as though he needed to ground himself in the moment. All he could focus on was her—her warmth, her presence, the way she still had the power to stir something inside him that he hadn’t felt in what seemed like forever. "I missed you." His voice was low, his words sincere, though they held a trace of regret for blocking her and cutting off any contact that she may have tried to make. He let the silence stretch between them for a moment, just long enough to let the weight of his words settle. There was so much he wanted to say, but in that moment, the most important thing was that she knew. "I just want you to be happy," he added, his voice soft, a quiet plea. "I mean it, Daph. You deserve more than what you’re giving yourself right now." He met her gaze, searching her eyes, trying to see if any of his words had landed, if there was any spark of hope left between them.

All he wanted in that moment was to kiss her—feel the warmth of her lips against his, to hold her in his arms like he once had, to parade her proudly around this bar as though she were the only thing that mattered in the world. But the past hung between them like a damning shadow, a line crossed that could never be uncrossed. Each word, each action was now a delicate negotiation, as if treading on eggshells.

[priapussdick]

me before reading mdzs vol4: lol at this rate wwx is gonna realise he's in love with lwj before he realises lwj is in love with him

me reading vol4:

[lotus-pear]

finally started p5 royal ‼️‼️‼️‼️

expect some royal trio art soon they are my dearly beloveds (minus akechi i hope he dies in this reality too)

[brofightiscancelled]

okay ill bite why do u hate kaoru sakuraba sidem aside from the fact that they went from hokuto as a main blue to downgrade to kaoru. to make it less awkward that I’m asking abt sidem on ur osomatsu side blog, what sidem idols would u assign to each matsu ?

i think sideM should collab w osomatsu-san and put them all in Beit so they can all get JOBS!!!!!!

anyways i hate kaoru from idolmaster sideM. i need all my osomatsu-san side blog followers to know that i hate this man. "i need a lot of money fast to pursue an extremely niche medical research track, which is why i quit my stable and high paying job as a surgeon to become an idol while having no soft skills, physical strength or stamina, or interest in getting along with people" are you Stupid??

he's not even using his idol clout to spread awareness of the rare disease he's trying to cure (like SEM does) so it can secure funding, he sees it 100% as a job and refuses to have fun, he is actively unpleasant and uncooperative in every interaction with his coworkers because he's trying to "rise to the top". it seems like the only thing he has going for him are his looks and that he kind of liked to sing when he was a kid. why not become a model at that point when you have the personality of a wet tree trunk. or better yet why not STAY A FUCKING DOCTOR!!!!!

also, i don't like meganes, so write that down.

[baphometsss]

if i see one more post about how solas/mythal/elgar'nan had a weird love triangle thing going on i'm gonna scream

[dazais-guardian-angel]

Well, at least Fukuzawa got his wish granted, I guess.... he's finally inside Fukuchi <3

[monstermoviedean]

if you have a good vibe/kind thought to spare and could send it my way. i'd really appreciate it.

[mortysmith]

I HATE RICKS BACKSTORY SO FUCKING MUCH

[seilon]

please don’t by k.will did more for the gays back in 2012 than any boy group can possibly do with fan service and crop tops in 2024

[jcs-singular-slut-strand]

😛